I do not recall whose idea it was to have children but, I am certain that it was my husbands. While I love my children very much, they drive me completely insane sometimes. I look at my life and wonder "What the heck happened to me?" I used to be fun, outgoing, energetic, perky (in more ways than one, if you know what I mean) and now, I am rundown, stressed, tired, cranky, and not so perky. Back in the day, I could go out for a night on the town, stay out until 3:00 AM (I mean midnight if my parents are reading this), and still get up for an 8:00 AM class the very next day. Nowadays, I can stay out until 7:00 PM and if I have more than one beer I am lucky if I can get myself out of bed for work two days later!!! I am not getting old, I AM NOT!!! My conclusion is my children suck the life and energy right out of me. They are blood thirsty little suckers that don't ever stop, EVER!!! I imagine that they look like those sucker fish that are stuck to the side of the tank only they don't do ANY cleaning!!! The needs, the wants, the whining, the arguing, the hitting, the throwing, the belching, the screaming, the crying...funny farm here I come.
All it takes for me to get some perspective is a moment, one little moment, when they are sweet to me, to each other, an unprompted "Mommy, I love you", the darling laugh of my youngest, and the toothless smile of my oldest and I melt into a puddle. It is these moments that I need to remember on days like today. These are the girls that I created...when the are acting like crazy monkeys, it is so clear to me, that part of them was from my husband.
2 days ago