Not My Child!! Monday

Oh, that MckMama has gone and done it again.  She is asking us to post all about the things our children did NOT and would NOT ever do.  Play along...it is fun and makes me feel so much better about my parenting techniques (or lack there of.)  Enjoy!!!

1.  My children are the most calm and delightful children you would ever see in public or at our house.  They do not spend days pulling each others hair, scratching each others eyes out, yelling, screaming or purposefully clothes lining each other.  I certainly have no reason to ever send them to their rooms "for a very long time."  

2.  I would NOT allow my children to go absolutely crazy at a wedding.  The craziness of all the other children may have involved an impromptu giant bean bag fight that looked a lot like sumo wrestling.  It was so embarrassing to watch other peoples kids behaving like such animals.  My children are much more classy than that.  

3.  I am quite certain, my children were the best behaved at the wedding and would never and I mean NEVER, poke the grandmother of the bride in the rear with a parasol that is to be used for shading the hot guests.  My children used the parasols as they were intended to be used and they would never use them as a sword, gun, Star Wars weapon, or poking device of any kind. 

4.  I would NEVER allow my child to run amuck in a grocery store only to hear a sweet little girls voice that kinda sounded like my child shouting "Mommy, don't you need these for your period?"  Huh?? What??? I wonder whose child that was doing that in the store...how embarrassing!!!  Thank goodness that was NOT my child.